So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
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