I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Randomize
