My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Your cock deserves a montage
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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