Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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