Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
