you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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