so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
