Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
