The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
