I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
