so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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