how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
