I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just high enough for therapy.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
