Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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