Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
