Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
