I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
