i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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