it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
