I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
