it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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