Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Randomize
