I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
