What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
