he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
