The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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