I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
