We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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