I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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