that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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