ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I just gargled with NyQuil
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
