Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
