you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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