You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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