How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
