My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
well you can't waste a boner
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
operation have a gay friend backfired
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
