I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Text me some of your sweat
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
