and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Randomize
