I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
