we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I will pee on everything he values.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
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