So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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