dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
