Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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