was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
