Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Farmville is her only friend.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize