its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
