and you said cock pushups were impossible
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize