someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
