Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
