I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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